11 Years Of Marriage!

11 years today. That’s crazy and to some folks who knew me in my younger years...impractical.

“The Best is Yet to Come,” my grandfather Dave would write at the bottom of every Birthday, Hanukkah, and Anniversary card. I thought it was endearing, sweet tagline that always reminded me of him. He passed away in May after 68 years of marriage to my grandmother.

I think you could ask all the cousins (10 of us) what type of marriage we wanted when we got older and we would say, “Gosh, I want a marriage just like them.”

Now obviously, there is no such thing as perfect marriage. I would be lying if I said Travis and I have never had a fight, disagreement, and some days I didn’t much care to be in the same household as him (and I can be a real pain in the you know what some days, ok a lot of days)...but Love is not so much something we “feel,” it’s something we do. As Andy Stanley put it perfectly, “Love is a verb.”

Now you can go all, Webster’s Dictionary, and see that love is both a noun and a verb.

The noun being the feeling. Probably how we all felt in the beginning of marriage. Maybe you said something like, “I am so in love with this person...He/She completes me,”....blah blah blah. Oh yes, I said something like that, and my 37-year-old self pretty much wants to smack my 25-year old self upside the head. No, not really, it was exciting, and super fun, but I️ thought love was solely based on how my husband made me feel (yes, I’m selfish, I️ know...but keep reading.)

Author W.H. Auden writes, “Like everything which is not the involuntary result of fleeting emotions but the creation of time and will, any marriage, happy or unhappy, is infinitely more interesting than any romance, however passionate.”

And that is what is yet to come if we choose to...love. To love as a “verb” is choosing to tie your wife’s shoes when she’s 9 months pregnant, looking like a Krispy Kreme donut.

Sitting patiently when she is, oh 45 minutes late getting ready, for the 117th time. Saying “I think you’re about to break through” in an 0-40 slump when he’s getting booed out of the stadium. Picking up shoes, shirt, and everything else even though you never get a “Thank you”.  

Taking the kids to Costco for 3 hours (it’s not hard to kill 3 hours in Costco) because the other is stressed over work and needs time alone.

I’m not going to pretend like I’m some marriage expert, I’m not, but when I opened the card Travis got me, the front said, “The best in life is yet to come.” I had to pause, take a deep breath, and thank God for my husband...and that he chooses to love me everyday.

Happy Anniversary babe.